In this post, I would like to share a little insight into another
type of behaviour that raises eyebrows, but which needs empathy, understanding
and support.
There are people who, when they were growing up, had adults who always talked about how they looked in certain clothes and what weight they were. Also adults who would talk about overweight people as disgusting, as being “in such a state”, greedy, would look at them waddling down the road and made them a laughing stock. This gave their children the impression that if they were overweight it would be the worst thing in the world.
In these cases, usually the adults were very controlling and
judgemental and never allowed their children to make their own decisions.
Often, the adult would say that nobody will like you if you were fat.
As these children grew up, they started to believe that
there was only one way to have some control over their lives and that was by way
of controlling their food intake. They hated their bodies and their lives, and even
saw themselves as being fat when in reality they were thin. If only they could
lose some weight, they thought their life would be perfect.
Anorexics would starve themselves by making themselves
sick after meals hoping that they would be put out of their misery and die, or
lose enough weight so they would be transformed into beautiful popular
people. On the other hand, Bulimics would have a reward and punishment
behaviour. Reward would be a binge where they would eat anything they
liked and punishment where they would make themselves sick.
Unfortunately, if we make ourselves sick a few times after
meals the body, starts to reject food and then it becomes very dangerous! The
danger, as always in this cases, is not only physical, but also emotional, and
psychological, leading to a never ending vicious circle.
The only way to stop this behaviour is for them to start to
feel good about themselves and reach a balance.
Regrettably, this is not easy to achieve. The longer this behaviour and conditioning
has been endured, the more engrained it is within one’s personality, attitude,
and physical condition.
If you find this personally affects you, either as your
behaviour, or as the behaviour of a loved one, it is important to understand
that understanding and support are key to changing things around. If you have difficulty in finding, or
offering, the support that is needed, get in touch with me, either by
commenting below, or sending me a private message.
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